I tell my assistant “I’m busy! unless it’s Jesus or Taylor (Swift) don’t bother me”
Scott Borchetta (x)

(via longlivethegirlinthedress)



Forgive the trees
for the way they can’t stop shaking
even after all these years of practice.
Forgive yourself
for the days you don’t even want to try.
Y.Z, a dying art (via topkun)

(via fullynumbed)


baby: d... d... d...
father: ...dad? omg you are going to say dad as your first word!!!
baby: d... dONT WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT
baby: *guitar sounds from baby's mouth*

foreveralone-lyguy:

allisonargentsarrows:

This bitch put me in an ugly-ass champagne floor gown that looks terrible with my skin tone and she is wearing a cardigan to my birthday party. I refuse to be disrespected by this.

ok but what that the fuck is a hand hug

foreveralone-lyguy:

allisonargentsarrows:

This bitch put me in an ugly-ass champagne floor gown that looks terrible with my skin tone and she is wearing a cardigan to my birthday party. I refuse to be disrespected by this.

ok but what that the fuck is a hand hug

(via ihateburritos)


oreoofficial:

healthy snack in under 1 minute!

  1. buy organic apple
  2. take “organic” sticker off of apple
  3. throw out apple
  4. place sticker on box of oreo™ cookies

(via jonasbrothers)


glowcloud:

I have to say the Kim k app was an amazing business idea and I feel like it has already done wonders for her brand. Now I see pictures of Kim kardashian and I think “that’s my extremely generous friend Kim she really got my modeling career off the ground”

(via beyonce-just)


(via beyonce-just)


mcdolands:

Me: “dad am i adopted?”
Dad:no, ur David. why woud anyone name you ‘Adopted’? even if we wanted to, ur name was alredy David when we adopted you

(via beyonce-just)


i recommend the creme brulee

image

i recommend you go away

image

(via weepingdildo)